Friday, April 28, 2017

Taking what I'm getting

It was a long weekend, followed by a longer week.  I'm so glad it's Friday!!  So I can have a nice long weekend again.  Well, two days, but I'll take what I can get.

Last Friday night, we celebrated the birthday of my nephew, Josh.  He attends college nearby.  It was great that he actually remembered to come this year because last year he was in the middle of a huge project and up against a deadline and fell asleep in the campus library.  That year, we made a video of us singing to his cake and Leon blew out the candles.


This year he got to blow out his own!  Happy Birthday Josh!

Saturday is where the real fun began.  While we installed the new washer and then Maddy and I worked on the last projects before she had to head back to her last two weeks of student teaching, I happened to check my FB messages.  My siblings and I have a private message board that started when my dad fell off a train and broke his back two years ago.  It was meant to keep us all informed and since then it's been to just update us whenever anything momentous happens in our lives that we don't want to blurt to all the "friends" on FB.

So anyway, back to the message.  I found out that while my mom and dad were enjoying coffee that day at the nursing home, Mom started speaking gibberish and then collapsed, passing out.  Dad caught her and yelled for the nurses.  Mom was rushed to the ER where they found a mass in her colon.  There was a lot of speculation as to what it could be but we were praying for a miracle and trusted that God knew what needed to happen and we'd find out eventually.

I have two sisters and a brother back in my home town and they are awesome.  Taking turns they stayed with Mom and Dad at the hospital.  Saturday night we didn't know much, other than she was there and there was a mysterious mass.  

At church on Sunday, I didn't know that Robb had told our pastor and there was a prayer during the service for Mom.  *sob*  I had to go stock my purse with Kleenex during the next hymn as my hands weren't keeping up.  After church, we took the girls out to lunch and Maddy took off straight from the restaurant to head north again.  While working on the prom dress, I got word that the mass was most likely cancer and the options were bleak.  So Meri's prom dress, anyway, was worked on with blood, sweat and now tears.  I'm sure Maddy's wedding dress will too.  It already has some blood from a poked finger...  

A lot of prayers were silently spoken that night.  Even for Meri because she wanted to see her Grandma.  She begged me to let her go spend the night at the hospital with her.  She won.  She drove solo three hours, getting there around 9pm and stayed with Mom so Dad could go home and get some sleep.  I had to call the school the next morning to say she wouldn't be there.  After much blubbering, the secretary just said, "I'll tell the teachers that she's sick.  ok?"  

The next day, a colonoscopy got scheduled for Tuesday.  Melanie got so many conflicting answers from too many doctors.  The speculation for the mass ranged from cancer to a pool of hardened blood since Mom had lost more blood since arriving at the hospital.  We prayed harder that it was just hardened blood.  We had hope for that miracle and the day was easier to live through.  Robb and I planned a day trip for Tuesday.  During the drive there, we got a message that it was actually cancer and it was blocking her colon completely.  So the surgery was being planned for Thursday.

It was hard to seem upbeat and positive but with my gift of gab, Robb let me jabber away with Mom telling her everything about anything.  She just held my hand and thanked God with Dad that they'd had so many children that cared.  *sob*  Then Robb and I had to head home.  

The surgery was moved up to Wednesday around noon.  So after discussing with Robb, I planned to turn around the next morning and head back alone for a couple days.  He became Mr. Mom for the duration and as soon as Leon was on the early bus Wednesday, I headed out.  I tried to cry it all out during the trip so my face could clear up by the time I got there.  My mom and dad are so cute...



Unfortunately I had a couple phone conference calls to make and I'd told my boss I'd work from the hospital, so after I hugged Mom just before surgery, I went and settled with the laptop in the surgery waiting room and attended the calls.  I felt like I was more intimidating and emphatic than I'd ever been before in the meetings...  "We NEED you to DO this!"  I remember saying.  Well, they DO...  

During my calls, Dad and Melanie ran out got some lunches for us.  Then my dad had me message his sister to let her know what's going on.  She called him immediately.  We found out that her husband was having some major heart issues and they were flying him from Texas where they'd been snowbirds, back to town Thursday and will be arriving at the exact same hospital Mom was at.  How convenient is THAT?!

The surgery went well.  And after a couple hours, Mom came back to the new room that they'd moved us to during surgery.  She was miserable and confused.  With her dementia, she forgot anything that was told to her, thankfully but unfortunately.  We instructed the nurses to not mention the cancer around her.  As far as Mom was concerned, the mass they removed was infection and that's what made her have to come here.  You don't know my mom.   If she gets something like this in her head, she won't let go.  She'll fixate on it and worry over it non-stop.  Even with the forgetting, her brain will work on it behind the scenes making her anxious without her knowing why. 

An Illinois sister sent flowers that had (I repeat HAD) candy in the base.  YaY!

Whenever Mom moved, her incision would scream at her and she'd ask "What do you suppose is making me be in such pain right here?"  Well you had surgery today Mom.  "OH!  What for?!"  
and there we would be again.

I stayed with Mom Wednesday afternoon, night and until 5 on Thursday.  The night was pretty rough.  Mom has good hearing and the pullout couch makes a lot of crinkle noises.  

At 11pm, a visitor came in the room with a quick knock and flipping the light on.  He had two pizzas in his hands.  I sat up stunned and he pointed at Mom as he walked to the bed as if to say, "She ordered this!"  I said, "Can I help you?"  and he walked closer to the bed still pointing.  He realized he was in the wrong room as I told him the same thing and embarrassed, he left, turning the light off as he went.  yikes...  He could've left me a slice...

The nurses finally got her pain managed but when the meds wore off, you could sure tell.  
Morning came too quick.

 At lunchtime Thursday, my brother wanted to meet up with me for lunch.  My sister from Wisconsin and one of her daughters were supposed to arrive soon but Dad was with Mom so I left for a bit.  Visited quick with another sister who was helping with a Radiothon for the Children's Miracle Network downstairs in the hospital.  Her son was the preemie born 6 years ago and was their own little miracle.  He IS a poster child for their efforts!  


That's him.  

So I walked across the street to meet up with Mark.  While walking, I called my Wisc sister to see what their ETA was.  She said, "We're having a quick lunch across the street from the hospital before we go up and see Mom."  seriously???  I'm on my way THERE to have a quick lunch with our brother!  So the four of us had a great lunch over there then we came back to the hospital.  


My sister and Mom.

My niece.  She's a professional model and made me delete the photo where she looked like she was half asleep... ;)

After visiting for a bit, my dad, niece and I went down to see Kristin again and to enter some raffle tickets, then headed to the elevators.  

At the elevator, I was explaining to my niece why Brae was on the poster and how his mom had gotten so involved in the Miracle network.  A few nurses were waiting with us and got on the same elevator as we did.  They must have overheard because they exclaimed, "WE know Braedon!"  you do?  "We work in the NICU! Of course we know him!"  Wow!  I pointed to each of us, "aunt, grandpa and cousin"  

small world!  But big hospital!  What were the odds?
Brae is a rock star...

As of Thursday, Mom was coming back to her old self, JUST a little.  But was dying for something to drink.  Up to this point she'd only gotten the little pink sponge sticks to roll around her mouth.  The nurse in training had stopped in to see Mom and schooled us on what NPO means. NOTHING BY MOUTH.  Then proceeded to sweetly ask "Miss Connie" if she would like a dinner tray.  I suppose so she could yell "WELL YOU CAN'T HAVE ONE!!"   Mom did get a little juice that day... :)

I left around five on Thursday and headed home.  Mom was in good hands and getting better with each minute.  I think you can tell by how snippy she was starting to get with the nurses.  In her mind, she is READY to go home.  

With the dementia, the family has decided to forgo chemo or radiation treatments as they'll just be too hard on Mom and give the dementia a kick every time.  

So the cancer will grow again.  How quickly, we don't know.  



But Thanks be to God, we've got more time now with this wonderful lady and I'll take whatever time we get.

7 comments:

Anne in the kitchen said...

This is such a sweet post and did make me tear up a tad. Wishing and hoping for the best.

Melissa said...

Praying for your sweet Momma and Daddy -

Tina said...

Praying for all of you. Your mom has gorgeous eyes and you can see a slight smile there....I bet she lights up the room when she really smiles at you.

Rachel said...

That was such a sweet post. I can tell how much love you have for your mom (and your entire family.) Sending prayers for your mom and your family!

Michelle said...

I am glad that you have such a great family network for support. Sending many more prayers your way.

slugmama said...

Times like these are when you can be grateful for such a large and close family.
Take care of yourself now too.
Hugs to you and everyone....

Jane said...

What a wonderful family support system you have. I love the picture of your mom - she's a fighter! Now I need a kleenex! Glad your mom is on the mend - every minute you all have together is precious.

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