My Right Foot

They should make a movie out of this... I'm pretty sure My Left Foot was much less interesting than this.

A week ago Saturday marked the first weekend of spring break. Went to a ladies church meeting that morning and then went to a Black Belt workout with Meri. Her first ever. We had a good but tiring time. I'm old. This sort of thing wears me out sometimes... And I had to conserve my energy because I was needing to do a mid-term testing in two hours.

Ten years ago, I had already done one mid-term, but to test for the 3rd degree which I hope to attain someday, I need to do 3 mid-terms. So on to number 2.

Testing started. Since Meri had worn her black belt uniform to the workout, they asked her to sit up with the judges! She got a score sheet to judge with and everything! She felt pretty important.

I've never been asked...

My form, a structured series of taekwondo moves was towards the beginning of the event. I assume to inspire the younger kids while they're still paying attention. My balance bordered on the sucky side in two areas of the form. I'm used to a linoleum floor to practice on, not foamy stuff and my foot stuck.

So inspirational, not so much...
This is what the form is supposed to look like. I'm not as energetic or young as this chick.


However then I did my alternate double stick (Double Bahng Mahng Ee) form and nailed it. I did awesome. Yelling very loudly at each area where I was supposed to and scaring small children near the wall. As I was ending I saw my instructor writing down on my score sheet and smiling. Whew! That might make up for my lack of balance on the first form! Below is someone doing the double stick form that I did. I don't know who he is, but I did it pretty similarly.


So I sat on the sidelines after that and watched the rest of the kids show off their forms and sparring. I didn't have to spar this time. I was instead doing board breaks...

The reason for the "My Right Foot" heading.

Wait for it...

So it came to the board breaks. They paired me up with a short black belt kid to hold boards with. My arms ached after the first two kids breaking (and unsuccessfully I might add) trying to hold this board up on my own basically, since this kid was too short to hold it up higher. They finally replaced him with my instructor and kids started breaking boards after that.

Meri and Robb had to leave before the board breaks because Meri had a big time babysitting gig to get to. So they missed out.

In time, I was relieved of my board holding duties and got my boards ready to do my own breaking. I gave the boards to my board holders and told them what I was breaking with. A hammer fist and a jump axe kick. And gave them instructions on how to stand, hold it, etc. One of the holders was impressed that I was doing a jump axe kick and said, "Awesome..." I just added, "um yeah, not so awesome."

I broke the hammer fist without a sweat. Those are easy when you get your hips into it. And I struck one of the board holders by accident. But that's ok.

Then came the notorious jump axe kick. I raised myself up off the ground with my left leg and brought my right foot up and around the board, bringing it down hard with my heel and broke the board.

Cool... I was happy and raised my hand to be bow out.

Not so fast...

"Miss XXXXXXX? Exactly what board break was that?" From the main judge.

Um, a jump axe kick Sir?!

No it wasn't. Apparently a jump axe kick requires both feet in the air while the board is being broken.

Really??... Do you want me to do it again Sir?

Yes please ma'am.

dang. *that was to myself.* *my own personal instructor had said that a little hop then break would be acceptable. Not so....* *I'm 45...* *and my body is not built for that kind of jumping these days.* *but I said none of this out loud.*

I had done one of those kicks with both feet in the air during my class and it was awesome, however the stupid board hadn't broken. During testing, my adrenalin starts pumping and many times when I wasn't able to break boards in class, I could during testing... It would freak out my instructor. So I crossed my fingers, said a little prayer and decided I could do this.

I did the best I could with my jump and brought my right foot up but not around. My foot nailed the board from underneath. As I gasped and brought it down to the floor, I quickly bowed out and the judge asked if I was ok and could try again. You get 3 tries to break a board.

"Yes Sir! Just need to get blood back into my foot again Sir!"

One of the black belt board holders said, "But you're getting it on the floor, ma'am..."

Oh dear...

Someone ran to get a paper towel and a first aid kit. They had me sit at a chair behind the judges table. *My first time!!!!* and another judge bandaged and taped up my foot, giving me advice. The top of my foot looked like a large knot was going to erupt soon. The toes had some torn skin and were going to look even nastier.

As luck would have it, I was the last board break scheduled. The judges finished up their talk with all the rest of the students as I sat getting my foot taped, really tightly... I'm so glad I gave my feet some attention that morning and clipped my toe nails!!!

Then after the official testing was over, I was given another opportunity to break with just the judges present. The only other option I had to break that I even thought I might be able to do, but I was leery about, was a step reverse spin kick. Not easy. But I'm a black belt dang it! I should be able to do this!

I conferred with my instructor and we decided I should just try the jump axe again. Well, I decided... he looked skeptical.

With the taping I couldn't stand on that foot, so someone looked for a scissors to loosen it a little. None were found but someone had a fingernail clipper. Okey dokey.... I used that and split the tape on the underside of my foot so the base of my foot could spread out just a little while I stood on it. Before clipping, it was like wearing a size 5 narrow instead of a size 10 shoe... But after clipping it, it felt more like a size 8.5. Somewhat better...

I was going to do this. I did the jump with my left leg and brought my right leg up, around and then down on the board breaking it cleanly in two pieces. Unfortunately it was still the little hop with my left... So it still didn't count.

I don't think I passed. So two more midterms for me I think. I'll find out tomorrow. Missed last weeks class due to spring break traveling.

My foot is on ice again today. The swelling hasn't been fun and I've discovered that wearing a comfortable shoe on it is important. If I squeeze into my mule tennis shoes, it only hurts for the first 10 minutes or so, then calms down. I think because all blood has been squished from it.

That's a good thing, right?

No pics. Sorry!

In looking at this video, this guy looks like his right foot came down before the break... hmmm....